Did you know Ebert only gave Disney’s Pocahontas 3 stars?! His biggest complaint about the movie–besides the historical inaccuracies he went to great lengths to detail and to which I say, “Dude, it’s a Disney movie.“–seemed to be the lack of ‘scoundrel.’ Apparently, racism is not an effective scoundrel like Scar and Jafar were. Well, I’m sorry, Ebert, but I disagree with you. I think RACISM is probably the biggest scoundrel of them all. And 28 Days Later did not have a weak third act. So there.

Love, Courtney.

“I kind of want to write about the cinematic genius that is Disney’s Pocahontas in my blog, but I’m afraid it would make me look like a huge dweeb,” I says today.

Came the reply of the cruel people I associate with: “Courtney, you ARE a dweeb.”

I can’t get no respect.

At what age is it not okay to admit you got Disney’s Pocahontas on DVD (TWO DISC EDITION WITH THE REINSTATED LOVE THEME “IF I NEVER KNEW YOU” BOO-YAH!) and the soundtrack (BEST SCORE EVER, ALAN MENKIN, YOU GENIUS, YOU!) for Christmas and it was the best Christmas ever?

See, I think I’m still in the safe zone. If I were a year older, forget about it. This blog entry would be about the political climate in Canada and how lame I think Stephen Harper is with a side of Britney Spears’s Latest Meltdown (discussed from a mature, psychoanalytical bent, naturally).

So I got Disney’s Pocahontas on DVD (and the soundtrack!) for Christmas and it was the Best Christmas Ever!

Pocahontas is a seriously under-appreciated Disney movie. I think 1 out of every 100 people cite it as their favourite (I don’t have the statistics on hand, but I’m sure that’s what they would be) and those people are pretty much like most un-recognized geniuses of their time in that they are un-recognized geniuses of their time.

I first saw Pocahontas in theatres, in the 90′s. I thought it was really lame and laughed at all the inappropriate parts. But that was probably my sister’s fault because she was with me and she is generally a bad influence (Mom agrees, Megan, just so you know). I proceeded to forget all about it. And then we got it on VHS and it was way better than I remembered. I still wasn’t there yet, though. I had to age some more first. So I aged some more, and when I was baby-sitting, brought it over for the children to watch (I was a great baby-sitter). That was when I was smacked in the face by Disney’s Pocahontas’s Genius. I suddenly realized it was an amazing film and made a note to watch it again and analyze the art direction and cinematography and sweeping score (all of which were brilliant) at my earliest convenience. Except then I left the movie there and never got it back. And then when I asked for it back, they gave me the empty case.

And THAT, everyone, is the reason I didn’t go to college.

And now you know.