Yesterday was a nice day. My sister and I carved our pumpkins, which was fun. This is the first time we have carved pumpkins together since she got back from China. The last time we carved pumpkins together, we shared a pumpkin and she almost stabbed me in the head with her carving knife. It was a Kodak moment, as they say.
If you are anything like us Summerses, pumpkin carving is an event! First we printed off our specially selected patterns from zombie pumpkins. Then I put on a pumpkin carving playlist. Then we covered the kitchen floor in garbage bags. Then we gutted our pumpkins. Then we stabbed the pattern into the pumpkin with nails. Then our thumbs started to hurt so we stabbed the pattern in with our knives. Then we proceeded to carve. I like carving pumpkins. Here are some of my pumpkins from years past:
From left to right: Shaun (from Shaun of the Dead), Nosferatu climbin’the stairs TO EAT YOU and zombies from the Dawn of the Dead remake.
My mom took pictures of our pumpkin carving party, but I am not going to show them to you because I am wearing Hello Kitty pajama pants and a Winnie-the-Pooh nightshirt. I would pretend I wore those clothes specifically for the purpose of carving pumpkins and not getting a good outfit dirty, but the truth of the matter is I actually went outside wearing that outfit earlier in the day, before I knew I was spending the evening carving my pumpkin. I am only semi-ashamed about this because wearing my PJs out in the daytime in public is how I let the world know I am a writer. OTHERWISE HOW WOULD THEY KNOW?
Anyway.
We started pumpkin carving at ten. My sister chose a complicated pattern. This means I was done 500 hours before her. I carved my pumpkin, tested it, picked all the seeds from the guts AND cleaned the seeds by the time she was done, which was after midnight, which means it took TWO DAYS to carve her pumpkin. We made fun of her the entire time. Here is my pumpkin:
I decided to get back to my classical zombie roots and chose Karen Cooper from Night of the Living Dead. She graces 99% of the DVD covers and stuff and also she turned into a zombie and ate her parents. That’s why I might never become a parent myself, to be honest. Anyway, pumpkin carving proved to be a character building experience and highlighted my delicate constitution. My wrist STILL hurts.
My sister’s pumpkin looked really BAD with the lights on. And she stabbed herself TWICE while she was carving it. And when she was carving it the knife squeaked a lot and then she’d say alarming things that didn’t bode well, so it sounded like this: “[squeak squeak squeak] OOPS! [squeak squeak squeak] DAMMIT! [squeak squeak squeak] OH NOES!”
So we were pretty convinced we’d have to lie and tell her that her pumpkin looked nice when it didn’t. Like, “Oh yeah, that’s excellent, Meg! Snicker snicker.” But I guess it’s true what they say–you have to suffer for your art. Her pumpkin looks better than mine! Travesty!:
She did The Joker from Batman. So now we have a pumpkin that will eat you if you are a parent, and a pumpkin that will mock you whenever you step in front of it. I’m worried they’ll both rot before Halloween, so we’re going to smear Vaseline all over them. Just like the pageant pumpkins! They’ll be so pretty.
-
-
publication date
Tuesday October 28th, 2008 @ 3:42pm
596 words, 46 sentencesmeta stuff
categories: personal
-
You’re um…wow. Really into the pumpkin thing!!
Your pumpkins look amazing!
I can’t decide on a favorite. It might be Shaun, but it might be the Dawn of the Dead zombies. That one’s pretty epic.
My pumpkins always are of the three triangles over a jaggy arc variety.
wow, any attempts of mine are put to shame. these are amazing!
also, nothing wrong with PJs. or tapered sweats, my personal fave.
Wow!!! Those pumpkins are beyond amazing! In my community there is a pumpkin sail after dark at a local lake where you can bring your carved pumpkin and they get lit and set out on the lake on a little raft. It looks beautiful. Your family’s masterpieces would look amazing out there!
Happy Halloween! ^_^
They both look awesome!
Holy crap these are the most awesome pumpkins ever!!!
Hilarious to think you get into this spooky frame of mind while wearing Hello Kitty and Winnie-the-Pooh. I just have to ask, what’s on the pumpkin carving playlist?
WOW!!!!!
WOW!!!!!
WOW!!!!!
That is all
xx
PS Clearly us Brits do not take pumpkin carving seriously enough!!
Awesome pumpkins, Courtney! What other zombie-related talents lurk beneath your friendly Canadian exterior, I wonder…
Holy…wow. I bow before you and your sister’s pumpkin carving prowess. For reals.
I just…er…wow.
Triple awesome.
This is why I can’t bring myself to carve pumpkins anymore. BECAUSE OF PUMPKIN OVERACHIEVERS LIKE YOU AND YOUR SISTER. !!!! At my best, I’m like…mebbe I’ll make the eyes ROUND instead of TRIANGULAR. Or one time I stuck hardboiled eggs in the eye sockets, which was cool until they went bad…eww. But then S did this elaborate pagan-pentacle pumpkin one year, and so many trick-or-treaters commented on it while mine was just devoured by squirrels, that I just don’t feel it’s worth the effort anymore until I can instill mean-spirited competition into my own children someday. ;-P Damn your artsy pumpkins rock-on.
^0^
—
Are these for real? Did you really carve those?
Those are some terrifyingly bad-ass pumpkins, mi amiga. I love yours.
Susan: most Canadians are. Okay, not really. But these Canadians are. Thank you!
Annika: I am fond of the Dawn of the Dead zombie pumpkin. That was a good Halloween. THEY’RE COMING FOR YOU.
Bill: you mean your pumpkins are ~classic!~
whitney: it’s all in the pattern! once you have it pinned down, easy peasy. and rock on with the tapered sweats!
christine: thank you! and oh my gosh, that sounds really lovely. I wish my town did something like that–it’s got to be something to witness it. Happy Halloween to you too!
Briony: thankee, C-P!
C.K.: thank you!! the pumpkin carving playlist consisted of two epic halloween mixes by Rev. Frost (they’re like 30 and 40 minutes each, I believe), a cover of this is halloween by marilyn manson, bad moon rising by CCR, tubular bells by mike oldfield… that’s all I can remember at the moment! it balanced out the hello kitty and winnie-the-pooh, heh.
starrynite: thank you thank you thank you!!! you brits need to get in on this pumpkin carving seriosity!
angela: thank you! and… *cue ominous music*
TKT: triple thnx on behalf of me et ma soeur!
Emily: ok. YOUR COMMENT MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD I READ IT TO MY SISTER AND THEN WE LAUGHED EVNE MORE. lulz! ahaha. I mean. I am sorry to hear of this pumpkin carving woe in your life. *sniffs for you*
Daisy: they’re 100% real and we did! :D
A: thankee, bb!!
I read this very early in the morning, in a dark room, so the pumpkins looked even freakier than normal. And then I kept reading and you just cracked me up to no end, so I’m not scared anymore, I’m just jealous. I now want a pumpkin. I’d even draw a face on it if I couldn’t carve it as nice as yours. I just want one now.
Also, it sounds like you have the perfect set of pajamas.
Those are amazing pumpkins! I’ll be going to that website tonight with B. Thanks for pointing it out. We have a book of patterns but they aren’t nearly so cool.
Yeah. That’s it. Classic. ;)
Vaseline on pumpkins?? Really? Never knew that.
Your pumpkins are amazing, the old ones, your new one, and your sisters. I don’t usually carve mine anymore (have to save my wrists for art, otherwise I’m out for a week or two). I do cut them in half and mine them for seeds :)
If we ever have a house, where other people could possibly see our pumpkins, we’d probably carve them again. I miss carving the pumpkins.
OK, can I just say “Sean of the dead”– one of the awesome-est movies EVER? But I LOVE the “Dawn of the dead zombies” pumpkin best of all. 10 points for overall “amorphously menacing crowd-age.”
When I spend all day writing in my bathrobe (usually in winter) I call myself “Sue Heffner”. I think we’re allowed to do whatever we want as creative types and “ahem” — grown-ups. (We always knew it would rock, and it does, does it not?)
Nova: There must be pumpkins somewhere in NY! Everyone should have a pumpkin! If not, you can share mine.
HB: It’s a fantastic site! There is a fee for membership (I think there’s a one-day deal), but it’s TOTALLY worth it. Never thought I’d say that about pumpkin patterns, but there you have it.
Bill: :)
Sruble: Apparently it keeps them from rotting for a short time or something like that. My sister has hers all shiny but I haven’t done mine so… Halloween should be interesting. :) Thank you: re the pumpkins! And I totally understand–my wrist ached the WHOLE DAY after I carved mine… yikes.
Sue: I LOVE SHAUN OF THE DEAD. Represent! It’s so great. And thankee for your kind words about my pumpkin. And hee, Sue Heffner–that is the best thing EVER!!!! I know a Sue–I’ll have to call her that sometime and see how she reats!!
omg. sometimes i very nearly forget how awesome you are, then you do something like that *points* and while wearing your pjs no less! those are so awesomely fantastically cool, you outcooled yourself!
Those pumpkins are AWESOME! Wow. Well, I guess you can always have a career in pumpkin carving if this writer-thing doesn’t work out, huh? (Kidding. But, uh, seriously, those pumpkins! Too cool!)
Tristian: okay so now I get to have a moment of, “the cool person thinks I’M cool!” or wait, “I have managed to trick a cool person into thinking I am cool!” xoxo THANK YOU.
Amy: Hah! Definitely. I will hire out my services every October and generate enough income to retire in like. Well, that could take a while, but. ;) Thank you.
Wow. You are so talented. I can’t even get a knife in there without chopping my hand off. Totally inspiring :D!!
xoxoxox
Hee, thank you, Felicia!!
xo